Thank you for sharing your story and your feedback. It does truly feel like she is taken over by her anger until we can coax her true self back, slowly but surely. It is so hard as a parent to see both her sweet loving hugs and cuddles, “I hope you have no bad dreams” side with her side that spews angry hateful words at us.
I appreciate knowing that as an adult you have learned when you need to take a break and find yourself again, because our big fears are that she will carry her uncontrollable anger to adulthood, but without us to help her come back out.
We do what we can, but like all parenting, it is a guessing game, and sometimes we succeed and sometimes we make it worse before it gets better. But we do love her and want to be there for her as she tries to come to terms with her past. I am sorry to hear about your past as well, and I hope you have a strong group of friends to give you the unconditional love every child deserves.
Thanks for reading.